I pretty much walked into work today with an “I hate everyone” attitude. Which would be fine and normal and all… if I didn’t work in a job in which I had to care for others all day. Empathy: the ability to understand and share the feelings of others. My empathy tank was completely empty today.
Sure, we all have these days. The difference is my husband can turn off his camera, turn up his headphones and get shit done. I have to put on a happy face (yay, masks!), and pretend to empathize with at least 8 other people. Yikes. It’s not like I chose to wake up with an empty empathy tank, it just happens sometimes.
Most days I’m a people person. Even if you’re an introvert, some days you feel more peopley than others. Maybe I had too much caffeine, maybe I didn’t sleep well, maybe it’s “that time of months”, or maybe my serotonin and dopamine levels are off balance. (Those little chemicals that help control a sense of happiness, calm, reward, and motivation) Whatever the reason, I’ve still gotta get out there and get shit done.
Research shows that empathy is part innate and part learned. Let’s learn! Proven ways to improve your empathy:
Get out of your usual environment. Travel. Travel near, travel far, travel short, travel long. Removing yourself from the day in and day out can help change your perspective. BRB, need to plan a trip…
Practice rephrasing and acknowledging. Instead of planning how you will respond to others, try responding with something like, “I can understand how frustrated you’re feeling”. Research shows that empathetic listening can foster positive human connection.
READ! Fiction, non fiction, children’s books, oh my! Reading about and developing connections with characters can improve our capacity for empathy in real life.
Random acts of kindness. Research shows performing random acts of kindness can increase your sense of well-being.
Ask better/deeper questions. Asking more grandiose thought-provoking questions can deepen your understanding of others.
Empathy allows us to have compassion, develop and foster meaningful relationships, and maybe someday improve the function of our world. Ninety-eight percent of you reading this have the capacity to learn empathy! The other 2% of you might be sociopaths or narcissists 🤷♀️.
You can’t fill from an empty empathy cup!
